Wow. I feel so blessed. It was incredible to hold Keaton the other day, and even more incredible today the opportunity to kangaroo McKenna. I can't wait to experience the same thing with Keaton, but until then, here is the most amazing experience I have ever had...
McKenna hates to be touched. All the nurses point this out to us every time we go in to see them or we talk to them. She fusses and gets very angry. Doesn't really matter what you do, if you are touching her she is upset. So the idea of kangarooing her was a bit overwhelming.
Kangarooing is holding the baby skin to skin. Is suppose to help them grow, helps their blood pressure and helps them overall while allowing parent to bond with baby. They put the baby on the parent's chest and require that you are able to hold the baby at least an hour (not sure why people wouldn't be willing to hold their baby as long as possible).
So I went down to NICU and was able to help take McKenna's temperature, swab her mouth out with a wet sponge and then they had me sit in the chair. I was scared out of my mind because she is so tiny (1 lb, 12 oz) and has so many cords, and I really didn't want her to get all worked up by me holding her. I am so emotional and wasn't sure how I would handle that. To my surprise though, she loved it.
They rearranged a bunch of cords, unhooked her from a couple different things and then brought her over to my chest. She was screaming (which is really the tiniest and sweetest little whimper compared to most babies) and so angry and the second they put her on my chest, literally, she stopped crying. Seeing her take comfort on my chest of course made me cry because it was so rewarding and special. I felt like she remembered my heartbeat and my voice and that it comforted her enough to calm her down. She just laid there, for an hour and a half. I was able to pray over her, sing her songs (Gospel music and ones I would make up about how beautiful she is and how much I love her), tell her stories about her daddy, told her over and over how gorgeous she is and how loved she is. She even looked up at me a couple times while i was talking to her. And she had her hand up on my chest and kept stretching out her fingers and moving hand across my chest. So precious. I am so in love with my daughter. I can't get enough of her and was broken hearted when I had to leave hospital last night to go home. My heart feels incomplete being away from my children-especially after an experience like that.
2 comments:
ahh this is the first picture I have seen you with your child. you look so happy as a mommy! You are such a great mom to snuggle and nestle her as long as you were allowed! You have so much love to give those babies...they are blessed!
Kimberly, this has brought me to tears. What a precious time you had with your miracle daughter. Isn't it amazing how she recognized her mother and her nurturer? God's design s perfect.
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